If you’re not earning what you’d like to be earning, chances are that you’re stealing. In yoga, asteya, or non-stealing, is one of the eight ethical precepts, as it is in all world religions.
Yet everyday we steal – from our clients, colleagues, competitors and ourselves.
Stealing time
We steal time from ourselves when we faff around on the internet, sometimes under the guise of “research” or “competitor analysis” when actually we’re mindlessly searching for distractions from what we know we need to do. You know – sell.
We steal time and sanity from ourselves by DIYing for too long – way past the point when we could afford to hire a professional to do it quicker, easier and better. We steal from our clients by looking DIY and acting DIY. We deny them the deeper, more professional experience by taking the short-cut, the cheap route, the slapped-together version.
We steal time from our colleagues when we ask for favours and help in a way which makes it really difficult for the person to help us. Assuming that most people are generous and happy to help others, we steal when we aren’t clear on what we’re asking for, when we waffle on in emails and conversations without getting to the point, when we ask for something we could have Googled, and when we are so vague with our request that we put the onus on the other person to figure out what the hell we’re wanting. We steal their desire to help us quickly and elegantly.
We steal time from others every time we’re late. We steal time and energy from others when we’re flakey because we said yes to something we really should have said no to.
We steal time from ourselves and other, future clients, when we go overtime.
Stealing from our clients
We steal from our clients and potential clients by being scared to turn up the volume of our marketing.
We tell ourselves:
“I’m bothering people”
“I’m being pushy”
“There’s already too much noisy marketing”
“If people wanted me, they’d have asked”
“I’m not good enough”
“They can see I’m nervous”
“Everybody knows what they’re doing except me”
“There’s so many competitors. It’s too crowded”
“I should just be grateful and satisfied. How dare I want more?”
We make our marketing apologetic. We hold ourselves back. We toe the party line even though we know, and think, and feel differently. We know we could do things better, but we don’t. In this way, we steal from our clients.
We say, “sure, you can have a discount” or “yes, I can accommodate that special request (for no extra money)” because we think we’re being helpful, and being of service.
Our clients are waiting for us to step up, to shine the light and show the way. They’re waiting for a deeper, more fantastical experience with us and they’re more than happy to pay far more to have this. We steal from them by working ourselves into the ground for peanuts until we are depleted, despondent, and bitter. We have no energy left to devote to crafting a premium product with which to spoil our clients.
Stealing attention
Where we direct our attention is the only thing in life we can really control. Our marketing asks for people’s attention. They grant this, and we faff around, using “inside speak”, jargon words and a foreign language that they don’t understand.
Our marketing communications says “this is a club. You don’t speak the language. You’re not welcome” even when we’re saying “book now”, “register” or “buy.”
By failing to get to know the language of our ideal clients (with all its nuances, power words and baggage), we steal the attention of people with our marketing.
Stealing from our colleagues
We steal from our colleagues by ripping off their copy, their special products, their graphics and their peace-of-mind. Instead of replicating the structure and model, leaving the colour for us to fill out, we steal the whole kit-and-caboodle and then act like a fool when confronted, denying everything. With an unoriginal business, we steal from our clients, who are getting a second-rate version of some other business, and never experiencing the real colour and flavour that we could bring.
We steal from our colleagues when we get bitter about their success, while being secretly jealous. We may give empty congratulations, or freeze them out with silence and indifference. We deny ourselves joy by proxy. We fail to see how the success of our colleagues is the success of our sector, and the growth of the market for all.
By not actively participating in our sector, we deny ourselves the inspiration that comes from dissatisfaction and rage. We may be provoked into rage by our colleagues but we fail to grasp its special gifts – that rage is a superb motivator to create more. Rather than channel rage outwards into a force of creation, we let it destroy us.
Stealing from the universe
We steal from the universe by taking more than we give. We don’t ever claim responsibility and all the gifts and potential that comes with that, because we have the universe as our scapegoat.
We steal our own freewill, talents, drive, unique experience and perspective by acting like a leaf in a stream. We sit back and tell ourselves we’re “in the flow” when really, we’re too scared or too lazy to take charge.
Stealing from our family and friends
Working long hours, late nights, early mornings, weekends. Hiding furtively in another room on Christmas day, birthdays and parties, checking emails and returning calls like a junkie. Going without holidays and days off with family and friends. Going without a house, a car, or further education for you and your family. Going without what you’d love, because you’re working too hard for too little.
In this way, we steal from our family and friends. Our self-consciousness to market ourselves, to say ‘no’, to ask for the sale, to up-sell and cross-sell means we’re feeding our egos and our fears, and not our families. We dress it up in all kinds of language, but we’re too fearful to do business, and so we steal from ourselves by allowing our ego, baggage and fear to sabotage our success.
In this way, we steal.
